


Hoemother.

by Tafferling



Series: Valiant Remedy Drabbles [2]
Category: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
Genre: F/M, Fan Fiction challenge, Fluff, Hoemothers, SO MUCH FLUFF, lost in fluff land, silly stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 22:31:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6677935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tafferling/pseuds/Tafferling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This has been written for one of the fan fiction challenges on /r/FanFiction. It was a random world challenge, and I drew "Hoemother". </p><p>It is also the first thing I am posting from my Resident Evil AU which features a displaced OC by the name of Sadja.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hoemother.

**Author's Note:**

> I am not even going to bother editing this. This came straight from the brain. A very lonely and very tired brain. Forgive me.

**C** hris tilted his head back, closed his eyes, and let the sun beat down on him. He shifted the steady drone of the boat’s engine to the back of his head, right along with the buzz of voices on the deck, and allowed the rhythmic _fllump—flluump_ of water hitting the bow to lull his mind to rest. He took a deep breath, tasted the salt on the water, and the scent of coconut wafting his way from the closest cluster of tourists. Suncream. When had he last smelled _suncream_? When he’d last smelled the sea without being headed for a deployment? He tried to remember, drew a blank.

He exhaled the lungful of conflicting emotions. Today was different. Today there’d be no deployment. Today it’d just be him and—

“Hoe!”

Chris blinked. Right into the glaring sun. _’For crying out loud…’_ He squinted, tightened his hands around the railing, and locked his jaw. His throat clicked and all the whizz and buzz came rushing back in.

Chris shot the distraction a withering stare. The oblivious distraction, the one with her feet on the second rung of the railing, and her rear end sticking out while she leaned her torso forward. Sadja’s outburst hadn’t just torn Chris from his illusion of peace, but had done an outstanding job drawing attention from a couple standing just by the girl’s left.

“What did you call me?” The woman complained in a thick texan accent, her boyfriend or what-not hanging from her hip and glowering over the top of her wide brimmed straw hat.

“Huh?” Sadja’s head snapped left and her narrow back straightened. She slunk towards Chris and stopped only once her shoulder bumped into his arm. He glanced down at the crown of her head and the sunburnt tips of her ears. Now there was someone who hadn’t bothered with suncream. She fell in on herself, a bit like a spooked puppy, suddenly confronted with something it hadn’t expected and being unable to deal.

Case in point: A pair of Texans. Thankfully, the couple wasn’t interested in pressing the matter. Or, rather, they met the warning scowl Chris hadn’t even realised he’d put on and decided it wasn’t worth the bother, before shuffling off and leaving a confused Sadja in their wake.

She tilted her head into her neck and frowned up at him.

_’Totally fucking clueless.’_

“Why’d you do that?” Chris pinched his sunglasses from where they’d been dangling from the collar of his shirt. He gave them a quick clean before perching them back onto his nose.

“Do what?”

“You called her a—“ He hesitated. This was inappropriate. _She_ was inappropriate. “A slut.”

“What? _No._ ” Her light brown eyes flicked from him over the side of the boat. She thrust her right hand forward, rubbing her shoulder against his arm with he motion, and started pointing enthusiastically. Yes, definitely a pup.

“There, Redfield. Look.”

He did. At first he didn’t see it, but then its dappled dark gray skin broke the surface. The dorsal fin came up next, slicing through the deep blue and curling the water in white swirls around it.

“A hoe mother,” Sadja proclaimed next to him, sounding incredibly proud of herself.

Chris felt his lips twitch.

“A hoemother…..” he repeated under his breath. “That’s a whale shark.”

A pretty damn big one too, easily half the boat’s length. Chris watched it glide alongside them, its massive body floating effortless through the dark blue.

“What then? The TV—“ she drew out the word like she always did. The Tee and the Vee, like she wasn’t even trying any more —“called it a hoe mother. And how can it be both? A whale and a shark?”

She let her hand fall back down and craned her neck toward him.

“I remember the ‘ _No, Sadja— a whale ’s not a fish. Sharks are fish, you dummy.’_ See, how am I supposed to get things right if your fish need air and then then they’re not fish and then your whales are actually sharks? That is backwards. _You_ are backwards.”

“I didn’t call you a dummy.”

“Your eyes did though. They always do. Silly Sadja. Can’t get shit right.”

He grunted.

“And now a hoe is a slut. That’s a whore, right? A prostitute. A—“

“Jesus, Sadja.”

“What? Relax, Redfield. Stop being so bloody tense or I’ll phone you one when get back to shore. Maybe you’ll start smiling then.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose and she clicked her tongue.

“ _Phone_ ”, she repeated. _’There we go…’_ “Who says _phone_ ? What does that even _mean_ ? And why do you _dial_ a phone, there’s no dials on those things, Redfield.” She cocked her chin up. “Dials are round.”

“Sad—“

“And don’t get me started on—“

Chris grabbed her by the neck. He felt the knobby bones of her spine against his fingers as he squeezed, could tell how she stiffened with the touch and how her back tried to snap itself straight. She spat out a complaint, a short whine quickly carried off by the ocean breeze.

“Can’t you just shut up for a while?” He tucked her into his side, on arm caging her in, and felt the short-lived protest of her trying to squirm away.

“Sir. Yessir,” she mumbled, her head bobbing against his chest.

He nodded, kept his eyes on the ocean and the gigantic animal drifting off slowly. It couldn’t keep up with the boat. And why ever should it? The thing didn’t have a care in the world. Nothing was going to hurry it on, it’d just keep plowing forward and live a life of blissful ignorance. He envied it. Momentarily.

Chris squeezed the small shoulders and Sadja hummed a response.

Nah, this was okay. Even if it wasn’t going to last and he’d be snapping his badge back on the moment they disembarked the ferry.

 _’ Seriously though? Hoe-mother?’_ He chuckled.

“There-there Redfield. That’s better,” Sadja proclaimed triumphantly, and showed no more signs of minding the cage.


End file.
